Idiots of Pinterest · Uncategorized

Idiots of Pinterest Vol. 1

I like to screenshot the most LOLworthy nuggets of idiocy I find on Pinterest.  Pursuit of such nuggets is the only reason I peek in on that strange, strange place anymore. Here are a few items that ended up in my Things to Make Fun Of folder.

wop2

 

I don’t understand this.  Did those baubles turn your brain into Snack Pack pudding?   What about pregnancy makes you require a guide to consume Starbucks? I assume this is something about safe caffeine levels, but how can that not be figured out through the usual channels? I recall being newly pregnant and executing a very simple two step process:  Googling if there was a recommended caffeine limit (200 mg) and Googling the caffeine in a Venti Mocha (180 mg… WORKS FOR ME!).  I can see the conversation with the barista now:

Bauble girl: Barista, how much caffeine is in this PSL?
Barista: 100 milligrams.
Bauble girl: I’m sorry, is that in pregnant or non-pregnant units?
Barista: Huh?
Bauble girl: You know, for pregnant people? People who are more special than normal people? GOD NEVERMIND LET ME JUST GET MY GUIDE OUT.

wop4

WOW that looks delicious.  Is one of the ingredients raccoon dung?

wop3

What adult prints themselves a nighttime routine list? Unless you are literally a two-year-old you need to get a hold of yourself.  Possible reasons you are staying up too late:

  • You cannot tell time
  • You have been awake for 30 straight years because you haven’t discovered this Pinterest guide yet
  • You lost your routine chart
  • You have your routine chart but not the decorative tulips that go with it oh god help
  • Help
  • So tired
  • So very tired
  • HELP
  • HELP ME PINTEREST
    screenshot_20160531-112406

 

I laughed very hard at this photograph of Toxic Laptop Dad and Sullen Volleyball Son.  I’m not sure why.  Safe to say that may be a Toxic Parent Warning Sign.

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Gawd.  What’s our opinion on this? I applaud the sentiment I guess, but how do adults think it’s their business to micromanage other adults to this extent? Get over yourself. Nobody wishes for an obnoxious ringing phone to go off during their ceremony (just saw this happen this weekend) but take yourself a little less seriously.  It’s not freaking Abe Lincoln’s state funeral.

wop6

Oh geez.  I’ve seen some twee hipster nurseries on Pinterest but this one is painful.  I weep for this child, whose name I guarantee is Wexford, Leopold, Rothschild, or Eastwick.  You know in four years he’s going to be sobbing in his teepee, crying out Please Mom can I just have some normal duplos! Mom: We’ve talked about this, Buchanan, not until they make them in muted tones of gray and sea mist! NOW SHUT UP AND APPRECIATE YOUR IRONIC, OVERSIZED LEGOS!

wop7

The more I looked at this, the harder I laughed.  Is one of the things to not plug them into a wall socket?

wop1

Is one of the things watch two hours of Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders: Making the Team while eating roasted edamame salt and vinegar chips? No? Well that explains some things around here.

 

 

 

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6 thoughts on “Idiots of Pinterest Vol. 1

  1. I just imagine how many things I would have run into when my daughter was a baby, had her room been like that. She only had a book case, crib, dresser, and our old futon in her large room and I still ran into something almost every time.

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