Gather Round Children It's Story Time

Tales from the Hood

One of the things I’ve looooved about this year is that in January we were able to move into a great new home. (Rented of course, don’t get too excited).  We had lived in our previous neighborhood for 2 years until it suddenly became really, really trendy and our building decided to ask for $200 more in rent.  Later, apartment complex tycoons and hip neighborhood on the metro.  And helloooo “revitalizing” area on the bus line! I couldn’t have imagined it working out any more perfectly though, because I ADORE our new neighborhood and would gladly ride a thousand stinky buses before I’d go back to sharing hallways with people in an apartment building.  Eww, I always felt weird about that.  Like, if I opened my door to make a run to the garbage chute and some stranger happened to be walking by, it was like “Hello there! Do you like my really really messy entryway which you’re 4 feet away from? Don’t mind me taking this trash out in my panda boxer shorts from Limited Too circa 1998 that I inexplicably still own and wear on weekends!  Good day!”

Anyway.  That doesn’t have anything to do with the story.  I’m not sure why I started with that.  Is it possible to start with a tangent? We’ll just write that off as a little glimpse into my autobiography, years 2009-2011.  You are most welcome. 

Carrying on!

So today I have to share with you this harrowing tale Jeff heard from a neighbor in our current townhome community.  Here we go.  So we’ll call this neighbor Neighbor Guy, and he was minding his own business and walking his dog when disaster struck.  Another neighborhood member, who apparently is known for his badly behaved and loosely controlled dog, was out with said Bad Dog.  Bad Dog was unleashed and took off after a cat, and…. oh my gosh seriously this is insane…. OK…. Bad Dog attacked the cat and…..killed it right there.  CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT.  Now remember Neighbor Guy and his dog were outside witnessing this; upon seeing the attack, Neighbor Guy’s dog LEAPS into his arms and proceeds to poop down his shirt in terror.  I want to say that’s comic relief, but actually it’s terrible thinking how scared that poor doggy bystander must have been!

Seriously, I cannot believe this story! If some maniacal, homicidal dog ever attacked or God forbid offed Chooch, I cannot even tell you the level of rage I would have.  I would have no problem going to jail to avenge wrongdoing to Chooch.  And I HOPE I am being hyperbolic when I say that, but I can’t be positive.

So we got this little insert in our mail today… (neighborhood name redacted such that it’s not stalker fodder)… and the footnotes are references to the condo bylaws, of course:


Safe pets are happy pets indeed.


3 thoughts on “Tales from the Hood

  1. Arghh. This is one of my biggest pet peeves about my neighborhood: all the people walking their dogs without leashes! As a dog owner myself, one thing I know is that no matter how well-trained a dog is, you can never REALLY predict an animal’s behavior. Not to mention the fact that it’s against the law! I’ve even gone as far as writing to the mayor’s office about it, because it is THAT prevalent in my neck of the woods. I am so sorry for the cat who was killed in your neighborhood, and I hope that the pet owners in both our areas will grow to be more considerate!

  2. That is sheer craziness! Poor kitty 😦

    I’m so grateful to be a homeowner with a fenced-in yard for our dog/horse…but we’ll be renting shortly when we move, and I’m a bit intimidated by the possible pet situation…

    And yes, it is extremely possible to start–and end–with a tangent. In fact, I think the more the merrier! (Maybe because I have a problem…)

  3. I know guys, right! I just can’t imagine one minute your cat is hanging out outside and the next minute he’s gone! Just unbelievable and so sad!

    Thanks Megan for the solidarity on the tangents!! : ) : ) I feel better!!!

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