I’m starting this series to pay tribute to the most awful, seedy, STD-laden program in all of the Television industry- Bachelor Pad! Yes, the Bachelor/ette are those things at well, but at least they try to keep it classy. This is just one smelly smut-fest. And I’m loving every minute!
Important Note: Quotations below are actual things that came out of these people’s mouths.
This was when Vienna got so full of rage she whipped a hibiscus pillow at this poor guy…
And everyone knows hibiscus pillows are the gateway weapon to more serious items… sing it with me: Wheh! wheh! wheh! wheh!
[Regarding their synchronized swimming team challenge thing] “I think the one thing I’ve really got to give is timing and technique. Cause I’ve got technique from Dancing with the Stars.”
“There’s a couple of things I’m just really blessed with: mental durability, physical strength, and problem solving. So if it falls into any of those three categories, I think I’ll do well.” –Jacob “Jake” Pavelka. Also he left out humility.
This is Erica, the chick that was complaining that she couldn’t dive. Umm, any guesses as to why!? It’s like those punching balloon things with the weighted bottoms that you can’t flip over.
“[My kiss with Jake] was definitely hot. I definitely have good lips that I maintain with getting injections every 6 months.” You don’t say?! You are definitely a great pair… keep it up!